Am I being too picky? Ask a dating coach

As a dating coach, I was asked a lot of questions each week and wanted to share this week’s top online dating questions. Then a couple of fun results.

Michael, 62, New York: Am I too picky? Is that why my response rate is low?


Andrea: No, this is your love life, Michael, your personal life. Of course, it’s okay to be demanding. Now, however, the key is to be in the right dating sites for you. In general, I recommend that you do not put all your eggs in one basket, that is, two dating sites / apps to start with is a good goal.

If the response rate is low, this usually points to one of three issues: a wrong place for you demographically, poorly displayed photos, or a poorly designed profile that offers almost no potential data about you. It is difficult to send you messages at that time, and they will go straight to the next candidate. Having help writing your dating profile can make a dramatic difference. I also recommend that you take the Online Dating Quiz!

Lauren, Irvine, CA, 49: Do People Really Know Quality People Online? And men want to go out younger, right?

Andrea: In the first part of your question, eh, you’re connected, right? Yes, they do, according to Pew Research, 1 in 3 marriages in 2020 were a direct result of online dating. Twenty years ago, there was an appalling stigma associated with online dating, which has been completely eradicated. Great news for those on their second date.

To the question “men want to go out younger,” of course, sometimes. And the woman will also often come out a little younger. Based on my more than 25 years as a dating advisor, founder of the dating service It’s Just Lunch and founder of, I would estimate that 85% want to go out with their age. Good luck.

Want to know what made me smile last night?

As a night owl, I finished checking the messages around 11pm and the following text arrived (slightly written by me): I worked with this client last spring and the last time I heard it, it was super excited about a 56 year old woman. d meet online. Here is the text of a Ryan, a 55 year old pediatric surgeon in Chicago (when he came to me, he had just finished a 25 year marriage, he was very busy at work, in his free time he just wanted to ski and to climb). mountains and wanted to outsource their dating life to me) I received last night:


Ted, 34, Portland biologist / scientist: I’m shy, introverted, nerdy, and have little dating experience. Do you think online dating would help me?

Andrea: That’s what I told Ted in February, yes. Practice makes perfect, a little. Dating coaching helps. After 4-5 first dates with different women, she was relaxing and having fun.

And here’s the text I received last night and this morning:


Yes, these are real texts, I receive them weekly, sometimes daily, monthly … that’s why I do what I do. It makes me happy when you meet someone you really like … or who you fall in love with … or you get married.

(Hopefully you can see that these are real texts from the horrible job I did removing too much personal information – my graphic designer didn’t answer your phone today!).

Click here to get started today!

Love and laughter


As a dating coach, I was asked a lot of questions each week and wanted to share this week’s top online dating questions. Then a couple of fun results.

#picky #dating #coach

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