Being a ghost is never fun. If you just started seeing someone, or even just texting someone, and it looks good, it hurts when they suddenly disappear for no reason. Whether it happens after being in contact for a while, or if you see them for a few months, it is painful and confusing. Here are some tips on how to treat it, so you can leave it behind and move on.
What to say if you suspect you have been ghosted
If you feel that they have rescued your relationship, the best thing to do is ask them directly. Try something like, “I haven’t heard from you in a long time, so I guess you don’t want this to go any further.” I would like you to be honest with me about your feelings, as it is not kind to leave me hanging. A message like this indicates their behavior while giving them an easy chance to tell you the truth.
Don’t chase the ghost
If you’ve called or texted someone a few times, they won’t answer. don’t keep chasing them. While your desire to re-contact them to find out what happened will be hard to ignore, you should. Consider whether you really need closure or whether hearing them say they just don’t care will make you feel worse. Instead, try to see them as immature and unable to have a relationship, as this will help you to stop blaming yourself and move on.
Allow yourself to feel upset
Once you’ve accepted that you’ve been ghosted, it’s important to let yourself be upset. It’s natural to have an idea in your mind of how you expect a relationship to turn out, and losing that future is hard to deal with. Allow yourself to feel sad, but also remember that the way they dealt with the situation says more about them than about you.
take care of yourself
Treat yourself the way you would after any breakup. Have a good cry, talk to your friends and family, hang out for a while and then start taking care of yourself. Whether it’s exercise, meditation, cooking good meals or watching your favorite movies, do things that make you feel good and remind you that you are perfectly capable of taking care of yourself and enjoying your own company.
Don’t be afraid to go back
It’s easy to get discouraged by a horrible experience, but the truth is, going back and talking to new people will help you forget about your ghost much faster. Reconnecting makes you a million times more likely to stop obsessing over what went wrong last time and to meet someone genuine and charming.
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